Candle in the Window by Christina Dodd

Author:Christina Dodd [Dodd, Christina]
Language: eng
Format: epub, mobi
Tags: Historical Romance
ISBN: 9780061082375
Google: f1FR11jJe6UC
Amazon: 0061040266
Barnesnoble: 0061040266
Goodreads: 992221
Publisher: Avon
Published: 1991-01-01T00:00:00+00:00

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CHAPTER TWELVE

Rubbing her arms against the chill, Saura pulled off her cotte. Clad in her shift to protect against the chill, she slipped between the sheets of the bed in the solar. They were comfortable; someone had brought in the warming pan and prepared the bed for her use.

The serving folk had had their doubts answered. In the weeks since William's return with her signed marriage contract, she'd been treated with respect, as befits the mistress of the castle.

Saura touched her lips with her fingertips. They retained the brief savor of familiarity, a deliberately passionless kiss left by William as he escorted her to her chamber door and then deserted her there. It tasted sweet, a pleasure of longing and respect. He wouldn't sleep with her, nor work his magic on her body, not as long as they had company in the keep.

Nicholas had remained with them through the end of July and the first weeks of August.

She spat out a brief, violent expletive, and buried her head in her pillow. Damn him for being there, and damn William for being so honorable.

In some odd way, she wished William was not her betrothed. No other man could command her respect and her affections as he did. No other man could make her feel guilty for being the woman she was.

Unworthy. Inferior.

If she were to marry William—and she would, for it was the right thing to do, never mind that it fulfilled her heart's desire—she must conquer these feelings and become the woman William believed she was.

Determinedly, she fluffed the pillow and lay on her back with the covers arranged over her chest. She sighed and closed her eyes. A draft touched her cheek, and she pulled the blankets up higher, up around her neck. She'd forgotten to shut the bed curtains. Scrambling up, she pulled the curtains from their loops and tucked them close together. The chill sent her back under the covers, and she settled herself again.

Sleep would not come. For a month, sleep had eluded her, and like a churning mill wheel, her thoughts whirled in a disruptive cycle.

The servants. Her ability to efficiently run her household was the one support she had to offer William. William's authority had kept them in order temporarily; she controlled them in the long run.

The wedding. This had been her first chance to prove herself as chatelaine. Ordering the meals, supervising the preparation of food, and arranging the sleeping quarters had kept her up from dawn to dusk, but she had done it.

The mêlée. That much heralded mock battle wherein all the knights present chose sides like boys playing at ball, and then proceeded to smite each other with swords. Men were killed in mêlées. Fighting terrified her; still, William was right. He should practice with his friends before confronting his enemies. She'd never undermine his confidence by suggesting she feared for his life; she knew the value of confidence better than most.

So all her worries were settled. She could sleep.

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